Once upon a time there was a little boy who lived in a house that had train tracks running behind it. The boy's father always warned him against playing around the train tracks, but boys will be boys so he often played around the tracks despite the warnings from his father.
One day, after playing by the tracks all afternoon, the tired and sat down on the tracks to rest. Before he knew it, a train came by, ran over his ass, and cut part of it off.
When the boy's father came home and discovered what had happened, he told the boy that not only would he have to go through the rest of his life missing part of his ass, that he was greatly disappointed in him for not heeding his warnings.
That night, unable to sleep, the boy laid in bed pondering about going through the rest of his life half ass and how disappointed his father was at him. Suddenly he had an idea. He went out to the tracks and began searching for the lost part of his ass. If only he can find it, he thought, I would have a whole ass once again and be in the good graces of his father.
Alas...the boy searched and searched, but couldn't find even a shred of the missing part from his ass. Soon the boy became tired and sleepy. Disappointed, he slumped down and went to sleep with his head on one of the tracks.
A train came by, about that time, and ran over the boy's head and killed him.
And the moral to this story is....
DON'T LOSE YOUR HEAD OVER A PIECE OF ASS.