A Soldier's Story

A SOLDIER RECIEVED A LETTER FROM HIS GIRLFRIEND, BUT HE COULDN'T SHOW IT TO HIS FRIENDS, BECAUSE SHE SIGNED IT "MOTHER'', AND THIS IS WHAT SHE WROTE:

M- IS FOR THE MANY T O- IS FOR THE OTHER T- IS FOR THE TERRIFIC H- IS FOR THE HO E- IS FOR THE EA R- IS FOR TH THAT SPELLS "MOTHER" AND THATS WHAT I'M GOING TO BE IN 9 MONTHS.

HE WROTE BACK AND THIS IS WHAT HE SAID:

F- IS FOR THE FUCKED UP LETT A- IS FOR T T- IS FOR THE T H- IS FOR THE HOE E- IS FOR THE EASY WAY R- IS FOR THE ROMANC AND I'LL BE DAMNED IF I'M THE FATHER.

AND THIS IS WHAT I THINK OF THE BABY:

B- IS FOR THE BABY WI A- IS FOR THE ABORTION B- IS FOR THE BASTARD HE Y- IS FOR THE "YES" WHEN YOU SHOULD

SHE REALIZED THAT SHE FORGOT A FEW THINGS IN THE FIRST LETTER....SO SHE WROTE THE DICKLESS FAGGOT BACK AND THIS IS WHAT SHE SAID:

B- IS FOR THE BEEF Y E- IS FOR THE S- IS FOR THE GOOD PU T- IS FOR THE TIMES F- IS FOR THE FUNNY MADE R- IS THE THE RA I- IS FOR THE INTERCOURSE T E- IS FOR THE ENERGY N- IS FOR THE NASTY A D- IS FOR THE DAD YO AND THAT SPELLS "BESTFRIEND" AND THAT'S WHO I WAS FUCKIN' WHILE YOU WERE AWAY.